Friday, October 3, 2008

Drugs and More Drugs....

How much is too much drug?? Just heard from Neuro and they want to increase her Zonegran by another 50mg...making her up to 200mg... Where is My madie in this picture? what the heck is she looking at? why does she do so many weird things with her hands? She is in that cloudy world between seizures and drugs.....drugs that try to fight the seizures and make her a dopeee kid and seizures that prevent her from developing!


I reluctantly agreed and then called them back..not even 5 minutes later getting a machine...asking if we can get a go-head to reduce her Clonopin...I think that may be a fair deal..I have been feeling like Clonopin has been doping her up for the longest time...its a freakin Barbiturate!! "nays" every time..I mean do you reeealy think the Clonopin is doing anything?? This very morning I was kinda freaked when I realized we only had half of a half left in her bottle and not her usual full half..figured some is better than none and I have since had it re-filled this Am...but never gave her the xtra half of a half...she finally went down for a nappy like an hour ago!! happy as a clam. But does one day really make a difference?? DO you think it may be causing muscle weakness??? Maybe that is why she cannot crawl or walk? Something in her brain wont even let her try let alone motivate her to!

Too much drugs.

For one year now we have been changing drugs, increasing drugs, weaning off of drugs...Zonegran has shown the least amount of bad side effects..and so far the best control but not seizure free...only those two random days... GO back to blog entitled "the beginning of time" to see her list of drugs....not typing them out and repeating myself....*sigh*

I hate pills. The most I will take is an Advil....during my period or when I had my wisdom teeth out....oh and Robitussin when I am deadly ill...I hate pills.

My mother had a long History of abusing prescription medication and alcohol...eventually it took her life when I was 17....

Shocking fact 1 about me.

(I will do my 3's...I looove that! )

So anyhoo I dunno what else to say....I am just going with the flow here...hoping that something will give my madie a chance...

thank you for letting me vent a bit... Im going to go read my book and relax while madie sleeps.

*shreak!* New Nicolas Sparks book!!!



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